Is there hope?

“What’s the punishment for a man who takes away a woman’s life while she is still alive?”

Screams a poster on the wall behind the counter. I am waiting for my sandwich at the counter of a leading food outlet when I hear this conversation:

Customer: “did you get that poster printed?”

Counter guy: “no… they gave it to us to display, the Times of India people”

Customer: " oh! These posters and all won’t work, u see… NO action will be taken against the   culprits. “kkay faaydo na tacho! Haav sangta nhi”

Counter guy:  "Seriously! Those babus in Delhi won’t be moved by anything at all. I’m telling you… Sheila Dixit’s or some other minister’s daughter should get raped someday. Then u see, how action is taken”

Well… the conversation must have continued but I couldn’t hear more. I went numb. So the anger is oozing, alright. But is this how the men in my country give vent to their anger? “Sheila Dxit’s or some minister’s daughter should get raped someday…. So that some action is taken? What the hell Mr Counter guy? The minister’s daughter is as much a human being as you are. She is a woman. And she didn’t choose to take birth in a particular family. You cannot USE her to get some action done. She is not a thing. She is human.  AND IN ANY CASE, RAPE IS NOT AN ANSWER! When will our men learn this logic?

Rape cannot be an answer. Not to your frustration over a break up, or your jealousy over her growing confidence or to your hurt ego because she back answered your eve teasing.

The root of the problem lies in the fact that our society does not consider women as equal human beings. And unfortunately in most of the households a woman is like a punching bag. A vent to the frustration and anger of the male counterparts. We don’t even find it surprising to hear stories of a drunkard husband beating his wife or a doctor husband beating his lawyer wife.  But do we think of the children who see this happening in front of them? They must be growing up learning that women are meant to be treated that way. So that is how it is supposed to be. If you are bored, go eve-tease! If you like her, follow her. If you are unworthy of her, rape her!

Don’t we see mothers pampering their sons and proudly telling neighbours how “usse gussa ata hai to control nahi hota. Kuchh bhi kar deta hai” … or girlfriends quietly avoiding a party because “oh, his anger! I tell you, it’s impossible… its jus out of control”. Do we ever think that avoiding the anger is not a solution to it?

When will the men in our society learn that a woman is not a medium of entertainment? Or a subject of entertainment? That she is a human being like everyone else. That she deserves respect? That respect is not something that should only be reserved for Sachin Tendulkar or Amitabh Bacchan or Thackrey or Mahatma Gandhi, but it is something that should be given out in generous quantities to every living human being?

That your anger is your own fault and you can’t make anyone else suffer for it? That there are better ways of expression….

Is there a hope? Can I expect to live to see such matured society?

(Well... I hate using this word ‘matured’ here... I thought knowing all this was the pre requisite of being human)